Monday, February 23, 2004

Here's a quick post from a British acquaintence who was asking for a little advice on his 'software'.

Let me know if you've seen this before...

Eighteen months ago I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from Drinking Mates 4.2, which I had used for years without any trouble, and use it best with the sound turned off. Unfortunately, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several other applications, i.e. Lads Night Out 3.1, Football and Playboy 6.9. And successive versions of Girlfriend proved no better. A shareware program, Party Girl 2.1, which I tried, had lots of bugs and left a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several weeks. Eventually, I tried to run Girlfriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the same time, only to discover that when these systems detected each other they caused severe damage to my hardware. I then upgraded to Fiancée 1.0 only to discover that this product soon had to be upgraded to Wife 1.0.

While Wife 1.0 tends to use up all available resources, it does come bundled with FreeSex Plus. Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 can be very unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made were automatically stored in Wife 1.0’s memory and could not be deleted. They then resurfaced months later when I had forgotten about them. Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and e-mail filter, and can, without warning, launch Turbostrop and WhingeExcel. These latter products have no Help files, and I have to try and guess what the problem is, such as attachments and Hairstyle Express, which needs to be reinstalled every other week. Wife 1.0 also spawns unwelcome child processes that drain my resources. These conflict with some of the new games I wanted to try out, warning me that they are an illegal operation.

Also, when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my Audi TT hard drive, it frequently crashes. Wife 1.0 also comes with a rather annoying pop-up called Mother-in-Law, which cannot be turned off. Recently, I’ve been tempted to install Mistress 2004, but there could be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if Wife 1.0 detects Mistress 2004; it tends to delete all Money files before uninstalling itself


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