Friday, May 16, 2003

Potentially vs Realistically


My Bro and bandmate just sent me this joke and I just had to post it.




A young boy went to his father and asked, "What's the difference
between 'potentially' and 'realistically'." The father answered, "Go
ask your mother if she would sleep with Denzel Washington for one million dollars.
Then go ask your sister if she would sleep with Sean 'Puffy' Combs for one million dollars. Come back and tell me what you've learned."


So the boy went to his mother and asked, "Would you sleep with Denzel Washington for one million dollars?" The mother replied, "Of course I would. I wouldn't pass up an opportunity like that!".


Then the boy went to his sister and asked,"Would you sleep with Sean 'Puffy' Combs for one million dollars?" The girl replied, "Oh my gosh! I'd be nuts to pass that up!"



The boy thought about it for two or three days and went back to his dad. His father asked him if he'd found out the difference between "potentially and realistically. The boy replied, "Yes. 'Potentially' we're sitting on two million dollars,but, 'realistically' we're living with two hoes."

Wednesday, May 14, 2003

Maybe His Brain Should Be Next...


Tuesday, May 13, 2003

TODAY IS DUMP ON MADONNA DAY
Hey Guys...
Are they playing Mcdonnas´(Billions Served) American Life or whatever the fuck they call it as much in the States as they do here in Germany? I have heard of heavy rotation ( and even experienced it for a nano-second) but I think it can be called perpetual rotation or maybe nonstop assault. I´m sitting in my favorite (cheapest) internet cafe and the help is even singing this stupid song!


Shame on you Madonna! You are the tool of the very industry and classic system that you were once angry at. Or is it because you didn´t get a fair piece of it (like the rest of us) at the time of you ascension that you were angry? I guess we all want to be paid for showing our ass figuratively and in most cases, literally. Okay, you are now a hard working mother trying to stay afloat but, please don't consider yourself an artist.


I remember seeing the movie Truth Or Dare and Madonna was being closely watched by the Canadian police for lude acts on stage. She was complaining about how this was her self-expression and part of her 'show'. For me you could express milk and it would have more meaning but, that´s just me. What am I saying here? We're just trying to make a living in this Material World.

Oh shize, it's a Madonna fest here in the café. Like a Prayer is playing. I thought I had found a cultural paradise but, it's just another wasteland. I've got nowhere to go. I am so out of here...

Monday, May 12, 2003

OK... so I recognize Rodney Dangerfield in the background but, who is the orangatang (sp?, Mary) with it´s arm around Sharon?

Now see, you don´t have to be on the same side of the world to feel what happens to family members...
So I think it´s strep but, it´s basically swollen glands, headache, earache on the left side of the head. Amazing and awful at the same time. As Peter (I once set-up lights for, many many moons ago for) Frampton once said, so now does my daughter,"Do you feel like I do?"


The other day I had a new mantra playing in my head or, maybe a mission statement. Repetition is not good when it comes to unhealthy emotional habits...

Wherever you go, there you are. Whenever you´re there, there you go... REPEAT! Other things for me to keep in mind:

True insanity is repeating the same thing over and over again and expecting to get different results...


Some more dumb stuff I do:


The 12 Steps to Total and Complete Insanity


1. We admitted we were powerless over nothing. We could manage our lives perfectly and we could manage those of anyone else that would allow it.

2. Came to believe that there was no power greater than ourselves, and the rest of the world was insane.

3. Made a decision to have our loved ones and friends turn their wills and their lives over to our care.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of everyone we knew.

5. Admitted to the whole world at large the exact nature of their wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to make others straighten up and do right.

7. Demanded others to either "shape up or ship out".

8. Made a list of anyone who had ever harmed us and became willing to go to any lengths to get even with them all.

9. Got direct revenge on such people whenever possible except when to do so would cost us our own lives, or at the very least, a jail sentence.

10. Continued to take inventory of others, and when they were wrong promptly and repeatedly told them about it.

11. Sought through nagging to improve our relations with others as we couldn't understand them at all, asking only that they knuckle under and do things our way.

12. Having had a complete physical, emotional and spiritual breakdown as a result of these steps, we tried to blame it on others and to get sympathy and pity in all our affairs.